The Illusion of the Perfect Life Nobody is Living

Aren’t you tired of watching people everywhere faking it and trying to sell you the solution to a problem that only you have? I don’t know about you but I am. I watch people all day long trying to convince everyone else that they are happy, and nothing is wrong around them. I am going to include myself because I only show pictures of my travels and my happy moments, and that is part of the problem… Nobody wants to know when you are sad, nobody wants to read why you didn’t sleep the night before or why you are going to the hospital and we all follow those rules because society has made it that way for as long as we can remember. All we want to do is smile to others and say we are “fine” and keep walking hoping nobody notices the dark circles around our eyes and how unhappy we really are at times. We are accustomed to giving others the illusion of a perfect life that does not exist and nobody else is living.

I know this is not something we can change overnight, but perhaps we can slowly make an attempt at being more human and showing others that life is hard, but it is also beautiful. Why can’t we show both? I have days where I am crazy happy, and I want to hug everyone around me, and I’ve also had days where I don’t want to get up from my bed and I don’t want to talk to people at all! and that is perfectly fine… Why are we programmed to think that something is wrong if I don’t feel like calling my best friend or I don’t want to visit my mom this weekend? It is all based on shame… We have been programmed to somehow feel ashamed of our uniqueness and feel embarrassed if we don’t do what society or our families expect us to do.  Don’t you think it is time to change that?

For a very long time, I believed that the family title was only to be given to those who carried your own blood and it wasn’t until I moved to the states that I realized that I get to choose who gets that title all on my own. It was an amazing feeling and today my best friends have that title… but it didn’t end there, I also removed that title from some people, because I believe it needs to be earned and I don’t need to have people in my life who don’t want the best for me and all they do is criticize me because they don’t understand the beauty of my uniqueness. I don’t mean to say that I blame them, I don’t at all but, I also don’t need them close to me, we all need to learn to love people from a distance whenever needed.

And that is where the problem lies, we are trying to please others and make sure the image they have of us is accurate and we don’t mess that up for them. Charles Cooley famously said, “I am not who you think I am; I am not who I think I am; I am who I think you think I am” and it perfectly describes what we are trying to do each day. I am not saying that change is easy, but now that we are all aware of it, we can do a little each day to be more present, to be more conscious, and to try to show others the beauty of our imperfections. That is one of my goals, and I hope to continue to share that here with you all. Would you join me?

1 comment

  1. So true!!! I used to post all my happy pictures on Facebook showing my adventures, love , fun and realized that I created another person that was not me. I love my happy times but also appreciate my dark times that make me stronger and able to appreciate my blessings

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